Imposter!

Inside & Out. 
being the best you.
inside & out

HA! how many times have i heard that in my head? more times than i can count, let me tell you. i was thinking about this today and yesterday after an internet influencer mentioned that she had imposter syndrome when it came to her art. mind you she has written a book, is all about body positivity, birth choices and womanhood, but she struggles with the syndrome when it comes to her art. when i read this is was a little surprised. the first question in my head was, who are you making art for? (i’ve had these feelings myself. i struggle with questioning my own skills in anything really. so when this person said this it really struck a chord, hardcore.)

so i dive into my own self, to see how and why i feel the way that i feel. i love making art, all art. i am finding that i like the art i make too. so that’s fun. mind you it is not all good art, some i call practice so it gives Little Leslie the ability to play, play, play. In that play Big Leslie is learning how things work so we can put them together later. when i get the feeling that i am not good enough….or that i am a crafter not an artist (i have a theory as to way this makes sense to me and it is about the importance of art and craft in my family as i was growing up) i have realized (through journaling, arting and all) that the voice is the Big Leslie trying to butt in. it is the filters that i have been given that i look through as an adult. The filters that tell me what art should be, who artists are. they are the structures that teach technique but not passion. i am the only one that is calling out Imposter! it is because i am not meeting the expectations that i have about what art (or whatever) is.

i was listening to a webinar this morning….you know the ones, here are a list of tips/hints/shifts to get you going in whatever direction and at the end they are selling you a course or something. in the one this morning the talk was about taking your art to the next level; from hobbyist to selling/showing artist. which is funny because it goes along with this post. She (kelliedayart.com) said this quote that really struck a chord, “Being good at art is not about how ‘good’ you are {at art} but how good you are at being you.” WOW! i mean think about that for a minute….how good are you at being you? at allowing yourself be you? not the roles you have, not the titles or labels or EXPECTATIONS….but YOU? when doing art are you trying to be good at art or be good at being you?

when it comes to the label Imposter, i have found that it is one that i have given myself. it is also a good place to dive deep into that because it seems that i am holding my art in comparison to something. whether it is what i think art should look like, or what art will sell or people will like, i have to ask why am i making art and am i being the truest me i can be when i am creating? because when it comes right down to it my art is for me. i create because it makes me feel good and there is no imposter in that.

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