waiting and patience are both hard to do. this morning i sit with my coffee trying to remain in my center. so many thoughts and ideas, so many lists and bulleted tasks, and i am trying to remain patient and calm, centered. that’s a tall order. i remember as a child i would get sick with anticipation, literally. one stand out time is the night before a big school trip to an amusement park. i was so excited to go that i didn’t sleep at all and spent the night in the bathroom vomiting.
as i have grown that same stomach wrenching happened often, sometimes i’d ignore it and continue, most of the times it stopped me in my tracks. today i sit with the anticipation, i am sitting with the excitement but i am also trying to practice non-attachment. what if things don’t go the way i have figured in my mind? what if exactly the opposite happens than i thought? that’s a bunch of what if’s and i have thought through each scenario that could happen. this time is different though, this time i am not stopped in my tracks (or backtracking for that matter), i am not running for the bathroom!
What’s different this time? it’s a question i have asked myself. here is what i think maybe happening. i thought of all the outcomes that could possible happen, each and everyone that came to my mind, good, bad, and some rather funny and i sat with the results in each instance. i found that if i sit and work through each situation that it makes me feel at peace with whatever out come that presents itself. now that doesn’t mean that i am not working for my preferred outcome, because that is not true. i am immersing myself in the life that is around me, pursuing passions and living life. i have just come to a place that i am not so attached to that one outcome that cannot see all the other possibilities or outcomes.
this doesn’t mean that i’m not excited about all the new opportunities presenting themselves, because i am. very very excited. i am just not so attached, i am walking the center of the road. i am excited about following my passions and i am saying yes more often. these small shifts have helped me enjoy this life. it’s ups and downs and all the opportunities that come my way, even when it was not my chosen course. i’m here to enjoy this life. a practice of patience and non-attachment has helped greatly.
how do you practice patience and non-attachment?